To Love the Lord

To love the Lord is to respect and reverence him. This means doing things the way he would have you do them. There are two types of believers, one believes in the theory of God but refuse to live in the obedience of his will. They desire his blessings but not his direction. The second type of believer has God as their Lord. They not only want his blessing but they need his direction, their lifestyle is impacted by Gods will.  The first type of believer gets mad at God when things don't go their way the second has joy in tribulation because they know it will work out Gods way. Proverbs‬ ‭1:7‬ ‭AMP‬‬ The reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord is the beginning and the principal and choice part of knowledge [its starting point and its essence]; but fools despise skillful and godly Wisdom, instruction, and discipline. [Ps. 111:10.]”

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Fill us up Lord

Feeling Empty? Let Jesus fill your tank.  “The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.”(To the Full)

‭‭John‬ ‭10:10‬ ‭KJV‬‬

Tame Your Tongue

The true power of a man can be found in his ability to control his tongue. As young boys we often spoke whatever crossed our minds even if we knew it would cause a battle to erupt. But as we mature we have to learn how to pick our battles wisely. We wrestle against spiritual powers that want us to speak what ever crosses our mind, but a man of power and integrity knows when to speak and when to SHUT UP. Don't let pride control your mouth, let wisdom control your tongue. 

“Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom.”

‭‭James‬ ‭3:13‬ ‭KJV‬‬

http://bible.com/1/jas.3.13.kjv

Marriage Takes Work

Many people view marriage as an escape from being single only to get married then day dream about being single again. Marriage is a covenant of 3. You, Your Spouse and God. And these 3 are supposed to be 1. But many marriage consist of 2 individuals that sometimes listens to the 1 that created them. But true marriage is 1+1+1=1. God=1 + Man(Adam) made in Gods image =1+Eve(made out of Adam) 1=1 God the creator, Adam his Image and Eve from the rib of his image. The fact is in order for a marriage to survive we must understand we we hurt or mistreat our spouses we are really hurting and mistreating ourselves and our God. 

If you are single learn to love yourself and God before you bring anyone else in the picture 

If you are engaged to get married be honest with who you are and where you are, address past hurts and disappointments before you say I do, so you can get past your pass so you can embrace your future. So you can love the one your with and not still struggle from the hurts of those they mistreated you. 

If your married, remember to love your spouse as you love yourself. And be true to the 3 that make 1 because of you mistreat 1 of the three you will have to answer to the 1 that created you in his image. 

Marriage is not easy but if we do it God's way it is not as difficult as some make it seem. 

Protecting your marriage

Protecting our Marriages from Erosion caused by the constant little attacks of the enemy. 

A land owner had a beautiful house that sat upon a cliff that overlooked the ocean. It was the incredible view of the ocean that was the motivator that moved him to purchase the property. 

What he did not notice was that overtime the tide was slowly eroding the soil that held together the land that his house rested upon. Many of his neighbors had support walls installed to "Secure" their homes, but this land owner was more focused on his view than he was protecting his home from certain destruction. 

One day he returned home to find his house sliding off the beautiful cliff that it rested upon. It was not until then that he sought help to try to save his house. He was told his house was beyond saving, his best bet would be simply salvaging some of his belongings. 

Many couples find themselves in the same situation. They have been enjoying the beauty of marriage but not protecting the foundation that holds it all together. And it is not until the house is falling off the cliff that we seek help. In most cases we are left with trying to salvage our belongings in the process of loosing our marriages through divorce. 

It is our prayer as the Facilitators of the New-growth Marriage Retreats and Enrichment Sessions, that each couple can protect their marriage from the deliberate erosion caused by the daily attacks of the Enemy. 

We must be determined to be 

1. Proactive and not just Reactive 

2. Understanding and Forgiving 

3. Resistant to the Urge to judge our spouse

4. Willing to understand that we think differently and willing to accommodate the position of our spouse. 

5. Vigilant in prayer lives, understanding Satan desires for us to abandon the covenant of love that we have pledged to each other.  

6. Willing to pray before responding to the sneak attacks of the enemy. 

Our marriages can be healthy and last until death due us part if we are willing to seek God daily so that we are always standing on a firm foundation.

Your marriage must change.

Often times we get stuck in our marriages and we say things like I want things to be how they use to be, but the fact is things can never be the way they use to be because as human beings we are always changing and evolving. So we must learn how to get our marriages to evolve as we evolve as individuals. We must constantly fine new things to love about our spouses as they evolve and as we evolve as well.It is like looking at a precious jewel from multiple angles you begin to enjoy all sides of the jewel even when you discover what other may see as  imperfections, through the eyes of love you see these things as what makes them valuable, unique and precious.  (‭Proverbs‬ ‭17‬:‭8‬ MSG) Receiving a gift is like getting a rare gemstone; any way you look at it, you see beauty refracted.

Learn to Listen

A foolish person is one that thinks they are always right. Often times when someone is speaking a word that corrects us we get upset and shut our ears. But true wisdom comes when we are able to appreciate and accept the knowledge of others. This holds true in marriage as well. There are some things that my wife knows that I don't because she is better experienced in particular areas,it is better to grow from her testimony then to have to be tested in that area myself.‭ we must learn to put our egos aside so we can hear wisdom (Proverbs‬ ‭12‬:‭15‬ MSG) Fools are headstrong and do what they like; wise people take advice. 

Never be too prideful to listen to your spouse.

Arrogant know-it-alls stir up discord, but wise men and women listen to each other’s counsel. (‭Proverbs‬ ‭13‬:‭10‬ MSG)

Pride is a silent killer in a marriage. Many of us have it but we don't identify it until it's too late. We think our way is always the right way. Often times refusing to hear the heart of our mate because we already think we know everything including what they are thinking. We must teach ourselves to be better listeners to our spouses so that not only can we hear what they are saying, we will also be able to understand what they are not saying. 

Love your mate today by hearing their hearts and not just your own thoughts. 

Take the limits off.

Many times we enter marriage with expectations of a wife that is a princesses and a man that is a knight in shinning armor. And when those expectations are not met we feel cheated. Marriage is embracing and loving your spouse understanding that they may have some imperfections and remembering they are also loving you with the same thing in mind. I have yet to meet a marriage with two perfect people in it but I have encountered many happily married couples with two imperfect people that are perfect for each other. Love the one God has given you "Flaws and All"

The Blame Game

And he said, Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat? And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat. (‭Genesis‬ ‭3‬:‭11-12‬ KJV)

As husbands we must follow the directions of God, no excuses. Adam was passive when Eve offered him the fruit of the tree that God told HIM was off limits. Then he blamed God and Eve for HIS disobedience basically excusing himself from blame. It is easy to do things that we know are wrong to keep the peace in our homes. But how peaceful is that peace if it causes us to loose the peace of God?  We are not suppose to intentionally upset our wives by being dictators but instead we should be grace givers and God followers. And we should not get mad at our wives and at God when we get disciplined for our own disobedience. So Husbands love your wives while you stick to Gods Plan. Do what's right in the site of God and you and your family can continue to enjoy the peace that is only found in the Garden (Place God created for you to enjoy). 

Mind Control

Control your mind! You will be surrounded by negative thinkers but you don't have to be one of them. We must learn to think on goodly and Godly things. Don't waste your time focusing on negative things (people that wronged you, things you failed at years ago and current situations you have no control over). Instead focus on the fact that your loving God has a plan for your life with all its ups and downs. And everything will work out According to his plan. You get one chance to live today so don't waste it. 

(Scripture)

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. (‭Philippians‬ ‭4‬:‭8‬ KJV)

You are not an Island

Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. (‭James‬ ‭5‬:‭16‬ KJV)

Many of us as men think being a man means you have to have all the answers and you must always be right. Thinking this way does not make you the man but it means you are delusional. 

James tells us that we need each other as men when he tells us to pray for one another.  But the problem we have with praying for each other is we are afraid to confess our faults, fears and frustrations to each other for the fear of looking like less than a man. Because of this many among us are sick. Many have become addicted to Pornography, alcohol, drugs and sex. And once pride settles in we do these things and don't see the wrong in them, or we justify them with Grace.  

James says if we confess and pray with and for one another we can be healed. Don't get sin sick because your afraid to let down your guard and confess to your brothers in Christ. Satan wants to get a hold of each of us but the Lord has already made a way of escape. Secret Sins Sink Souls. But confessions brings forth prayer which brings forth the healing and freedom that Jesus has already paid for. 

Leave your gift at the Altar

This is for married men but it applies to all Christian relationships.

Matt 5:23-25 Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. Agree with thine adversary quickly, whiles thou art in the way with him; lest at any time the adversary deliver thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to the officer, and thou be cast into prison.

This scripture tells us if we have a issue with our brother we must leave our gift at the altar and go Fix the relationship then we can come back and give our sacrifice to God. 

How many times do we see angry Worshippers? Worship is directional thus it is useless if the receiver or intended party (God) refuses it. 

God is telling us in order to truly worship the creator we must love the created(Brother, Sister in Christ including your spouse). Your wife is Gods workman ship.

Until your heart is right toward her, your worship to God will be empty and not from the position of s right heart.So when offenses arise take care of them quickly or your worship may not reach its destination. 

Be not bitter against Her

Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. (‭Colossians‬ ‭3‬:‭19‬ KJV)

Some scriptures are easier said than they are done. When things get heated between us we must apply the scripture and not allow offenses to make there way to our hearts. Bitterness is a heart condition, it takes place when offences are allowed to curdle like spoiled milk in our hearts.  If you have ever tasted spoiled milk it is a taste that is very hard to get out of your mouth just as bitterness is hard to get out of the heart. 

The fact is in marriage we will most likely  Hurt, offend and upset each other. But we must quickly forgive before the offence is allowed to leave its stain and bad smell in our hearts.  

Do you remember why you got married, do you remember the love you had when you said "I DO"?  What has changed since then? Could it be bitterness and or resentment has taken up residence in one of your hearts? If it is your spouse that is resentful, no matter how hard it is go to the top of this post and read the scripture and apply it just as you apply the prescriptions you get from the doctor. If you don't apply the medicine it won't bring about healing. 

Adultery on the Brain

Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. (‭Matthew‬ ‭5‬:‭27-28‬ KJV) 

Adultery is not just the act of sex but it is also looking at a woman lustfully. Many men have repented for physical affairs but how often do we repent from spiritual and emotional affairs that take place in our minds. Unchecked thoughts can lead to actions. Let's repent at the sight of sin. 

What if your wife Can't fulfill your needs

 Genesis 17:17 Then Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, and said in his heart, Shall a child be born unto him that is an hundred years old? and shall Sarah, that is ninety years old, bear?

Abraham and Sarah were very old and Sarah had not given Abraham any children, not because she didn't want to but because she could not. And after many years of being faithful to God, Abraham and Sarah were blessed to have a Son. 

What do we do when our wives can't give us something that we long for?  We continue to be faithful to them and to God. Many men escape from faithfulness when they feel their needs are not being met. Sometimes it's not your wife's fault that she can not bless you in the way you want to be blessed. Sometimes it may be God withholding things until the appointed time. Abraham loved his wife even though she had not given him a son(a heir) something men of that time long for. He treated her well inspite of her inabilities, and through faith her inability was changed by Gods  Ability. 

Fellows don't give up on your family, put your faith in Gods ability.  It's not over until God says so. God can bless your marriage even after your deadlines. 

Loving your wife while following God

Genesis 3:6 Keeping God first.  Many times as married men we want to do things to keep the peace in our houses. But we must remember keeping peace with your wife at the expense of your relationship with God will cost more than it is worth. If we lead our families in the way of The Lord we will sometimes have to face hard situations but the Lord will lead us to the smooth paths he have paved for us. Don't cause generations to suffer just so you can keep the peace today.